One of my favorite subjects......

along with my other five ;)

My SIL is teaching a lesson in Young Womens today about the sanctity/value of life. She texted me yesterday and asked me to write a little something about Brady. It's interesting that when one thinks about the sanctity of life, my little guy comes up. I suppose one could think of capital punishment, or euthanasia, or genocide, or any number of other concepts, but instead, the subject of abortion/termination and my beautiful son, my sweet, amazing little boy, who is deemed less than "perfect" by the world, was the first thing that came to her mind. Not surprising since that is what comes to 90% of women's minds when tests diagnose that their baby has Trisomy 21.

So - she wanted me to write a little blurb for her lesson - and - I liked what I wrote - so - here it is..... A little bit about the sanctity and amazingness (is that a word) of Brady's life - from my point of view :)


"I have had the opportunity to really reflect on the sancitity of life a lot since the birth of my youngest son, Brady. He joined our family in April of 2002, bringing up the caboose of our family of 8. When I was pregnant with him, there were a couple of soft markers that showed up on his ultrasound that gave him about a 1% chance of having a chromosomal abnormality. The only way to really diagnose that and get a definitive answer was to have an amnio. Since an amnio puts your baby at about a 0.5% chance of miscarriage, and he was our 6th child and c-section, my uterus was already compromised and since we wouldn't have terminated him anyway - no matter what - we didn't want to put him at risk at all, so we declined an amnio. The morning after his birth, our pediatrician came in and told us that he suspected that Brady did, indeed, have Trisomy 21, most commonly known as Down syndrome. They took some blood and did some other tests and at his two week check up it was confirmed that he did have 3 number 21 chromosomes in every cell of his body. As I turned to the internet for support and information, I was astounded to learn that 90% of women who have an amnio that is positive for Trisomy 21/Down Syndrome, abort their babies. This is a staggering number - women who planned for and loved their babies, and then find out at 20 weeks, when they already love their baby, have felt them kick and move, when their babies are fully formed with little hands and feet, fingers and toes, hearts beating strong - but because their babies are not "perfect" as the world sees perfection, or "normal" or have "above average" potential - they end their lives. In my opinion, they are missing out of having one of Heavenly Father's choicest spirits, and one of the greatest blessings and gifts ever offered to them. I took one look at my little baby boy, and fell even more in love with him. I knew there would be some hard things, that it would take him longer to learn things, that he wouldn't have the same kinds of opportunities as my other children, that the world would see him as a burden, as someone or something to pity.

In the early days I lost count of how many people told me they were "sorry" when they found out he had down syndrome. I wasn't sorry, I was grateful that he was healthy, and fine, and perfect - exactly what I had prayed for every single night when I was pregnant with him. He didn't have major heart defects, he nursed like a champ, he grew, and he developed. He was so much more like my other babies than he was different - I couldn't figure out how other people couldn't see that. I moved away from people who were negative, or who couldn't see Brady as we, his family saw him - a blessing, and someone to learn from. And each day that I was Brady's mom, I learned something new - I developed a new talent, I became stronger at something I was weak at, I learned what it meant, even more, to have unconditional love - love that grew exponentially each day - til it was more than I ever dreamed possible. I learned that my children were great advocates, that they had an inner strength and ability to respond to the world's views in their own ways. And - they learned to read people and gain insight and acceptance for differences that they never would have learned, if Brady had not been born into our family.

Every single day Brady teaches us something, helps us become better people, and blesses our lives. He teaches us patience, and about what is really important in life. He gets so much pleasure from the small things, and he notices things that we never would, because our lives move at such a fast pace. He helps me to appreciate the simple things in life - the ants on the sidewalk, the way water cascades down the steps from a hose, the wonder of automatic doors ;) When he learns something new and a light goes on behind his eyes and lights up his whole countenance - it makes me feel like I am witnessing a little bit of heaven. His unconditional love for everyone, his absolute transparency, his complete denial of anything competitive - to him, everyone's a winner, and he is so excited when someone accomplishes something that they are working at - his complete joy at the simplest of pleasures - it's like Christmas every day sometimes :) For every hard thing, there are a hundred other things that make it all worthwhile. So - even though he isn't valued in the world, because he won't accomplish what the world values, we feel like we won the lottery - because Brady binds us to eternity, and helps us to see what really matters in this life, and, the next......"